


Happy Holidays from Gotham City

by lfthinkerwrites



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Compliant, Canon Jewish Character, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, Comedy, Domestic Fluff, Drama, F/F, F/M, Family Fluff, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Jewish Holidays, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Romance, Ugly Holiday Sweaters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-24 15:01:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 7,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17102807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lfthinkerwrites/pseuds/lfthinkerwrites
Summary: A collection of drabbles about the Holiday season with some of our favorite rogues.





	1. Under the Mistletoe (Scriddler)

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Holidays everybody! As a thank you to folks, I accepted a number of Holiday prompts on Tumblr. Now that I'm nearly done filling them, I'd like to share them with you as well. Thank you so much for all the support and encouragement you've shown me. I would not be the writer I am without you. Happy Holidays!

Jonathan watched Edward hanging lights over the doorway between the kitchen and the living room with disdain. “Must you insist on hanging those tacky things every year?” **  
**

“Oh, don’t be such a Scrooge,” Edward scolded. He put the finishing touches on the lights and hopped off the stool. “If I have to deal with your ungodly love of Halloween, you can put up with a few Christmas decorations. Besides, one would think you’d be used to things that glow living with me.”

Jonathan could tolerate the green lights and question marks that adorned their home, just barely, but the twinkling of the Christmas lights was a step too far in his mind. They were too cheery. He turned his irritated gaze to the stockings that hung up over the fireplace. “Why in the Hell did you hang up stockings?”

“Why, to have a place to put your coal, dearest. Now, where to put the nutcrackers?”

“I see one in my lab and I’m giving it to Nightmare for him to peck,” Jonathan warned. He turned on his heel and stalked off towards the basement. He only paused when he heard Edward clear his throat. He looked back to see his lover with that irritating smug smile on his face. “What?”

Edward pointed up. Jonathan tilted his head upwards to see that at some point, Edward had managed to hang mistletoe in the doorway that led down to the basement. Jonathan scowled. “You son of a bitch.”

“Isn’t that the perfect place for the mistletoe?” Edward crowed. He walked towards Jonathan, that smug look still on his face. “Now before you disappear into that basement, you’ll have to kiss me.”

“I have to do no such thing,” Jonathan seethed.

Edward chuckled, then hooked his arms around Jonathan’s shoulders. “Oh come on dearest,” he pouted. “Where’s your Christmas Spirit?”

“You’re assuming I ever had any.”

“Please?” Edward asked again. “For me?”

Jonathan hated the fact that he loved this man, otherwise, he’d be spraying him in the face with his toxin. He leaned down and gave Edward a quick peck on the cheek. “There. Satisfied?”

Edward clutched a handful of Jonathan’s shirt and pulled him back down, kissing him soundly on the mouth. He pulled away, leaving Jonathan almost dazed. “Very,” he said smugly and something in the tone made Jonathan’s blood race as much as it irritated him. Maybe there was a bright side to the tacky decorations.


	2. Presents (Scriddler)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jonathan thinks of the perfect present for Edward.

This year would be the first year that Jonathan and Edward had spent Christmas together as a couple and Jonathan, for the first time in his life, was at a loss. What did one get for a lover for Christmas? Moreover, what did one get for someone like Edward Nigma? **  
**

Jonathan had never exactly had anyone he’d ever consider buying a gift for, let alone a fussy lover. He couldn’t exactly afford the nicer items Edward liked, not without risking getting himself thrown back in Arkham for the Holidays, which Edward would not appreciate. He could get Edward something cheap, which the man would appreciate even less. He could get Edward a gift card, but he’d probably prefer getting nothing to getting a gift card. God have mercy on Jonathan’s soul if he got Edward nothing.

So then, what could Jonathan get Edward?

On Christmas morning, Jonathan shoved Edward a package wrapped in brown paper. “Merry Christmas,” he grumbled before sitting back on the couch, crossing his arms.

Edward’s eyes lit up. “Why thank you, dearest!” He tilted the present in his hands a bit before he began to unwrap it. Jonathan watched him and pretended he didn’t tense just a bit. He wasn’t sure how Edward would take his present. Finally, Edward discarded the last brown scraps of paper and held the old book in his hands. “Ulysses,” he murmured. He flipped through the pages. “It’s an older copy too. Where did you-”

“It was mine,” Jonathan said. “I’ve had that copy for thirty years since I got it in Arlen.” Edward turned to look at him with a surprised look on his face but said nothing. Jonathan took this as a sign to continue on. “That book was the first one I ever had that wasn’t a Bible. It’s what started my love of reading, of learning.”

“Jon,” Edward said thoughtfully. “I can’t take this, this is important to you-”

“It is,” Jonathan interrupted. He took a breath. “But so are you. I want you to have it.” Edward looked down at the book and said nothing and Jonathan knew he’d made a mistake. “Maybe this wasn’t the best idea, I can get you something else-”

Edward placed the book on the coffee table in front of their sofa before he embraced Jonathan. “I love it,” he said and Jonathan slowly, but surely, returned the embrace. He should have known Edward would see the meaning behind the gift.


	3. An Unconventional Holiday Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A look into a possible Christmas future for Edward Nigma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> People who have read my very first Riddler fic may recognize a character in this.

Edward Nigma’s house for a holiday party. Aaron doesn’t think he’ll ever get over just how surreal that is.

To be fair, he and Keisha aren’t going over for him exactly. He’s just an added ‘bonus’. And it wasn’t exactly a Holiday Party, more like a friendly gathering, in Doc’s words.

She’s sitting on the couch as Aaron and Keisha walk in, sitting next to Dr. Leland and holding a small, squirming bundle in her arms. She looks up at them with a tired smile and Aaron notices for the first time that she’s wearing a hideous light blue sweater. “Hi Aaron, Keisha.”

Keisha immediately makes a beeline to the couch and takes a seat next to her. “Oh, Penny, he’s gorgeous!”

The baby, David, looks up, yawns then snuggles back into his mother’s embrace. “I just fed him,” she explains. “He’s a little sluggish.” She kisses him on the forehead and Aaron has to smile. Motherhood agrees with her.

He reaches over with his right hand to gently pat David’s head, covered by a green cap that was no doubt picked out by his father. “We won’t bother him by being here, will we?”

Penny gently rocks him and shakes her head. “No, he’s used to loud noises. Sometimes I think he sleeps better with noise anyway-” a loud commotion and the sound of running footsteps erupts from upstairs. Penny takes a breath. “Case in point.”

Nigma finally makes his appearance running down the stairs followed closely behind by Ellen, who appears to be holding some lime green sweater with sequin reindeer antlers tacked on. “I told you, get away from me with that thing!”

“Come on, Dad! It’s a Christmas tradition! You have to wear an ugly sweater!”

“No, I don’t!” Nigma comes to a stop at the couch and gives Aaron and Keisha a polite nod before leaning over to adjust David’s cap. He straightens back up and shoots Ellen a glare. “Ugly sweaters have no place in my home!”

“Says the guy who used to wear white spandex with rhinestones-”

“Oh, you’ll never let that go, will you?” 

Ellen stomps her foot and groans. “You are such a Grinch! You’re ruining Davey’s first Christmas!”

David lets out another yawn, then shuts his eyes. It seems even though he’s less than two months old, he’s become used to his father and his sister’s shenanigans.

Nigma lets out a huff. “He doesn’t look like he’s having his Christmas ruined to me.” He sits down next to Penny finally, Joan and Keisha making room for him and wraps an arm around her. “And in any case, I will absolutely not wear that thing and that’s final!”

Ellen pouts and Aaron can see the resemblance to her father first hand. He walks over to her. “Hey, kiddo. What’s this about an ugly sweater?”

Ellen’s face lights up when she sees him. They’ve always gotten along, surprisingly. “Hey, Aaron! I made sweaters for everybody,” she pauses to point at her own gaudy red sweater for emphasis, “but Dad won’t wear his because he’s a jerky old Grinch!”

Nigma looks up briefly from doting on his son to making a face at his daughter. “Just for that, I’m taking back your Christmas present.”

There’s no venom or real malice behind his words. In fact, the whole exchange feels like it happened several times before. Ellen, in turn, sticks out her tongue at her father, who laughs and goes back to chatting with Joan. Aaron pokes Ellen in the side. “You want to get your Old Man in that sweater, right?”

Ellen’s face takes on a devious expression. “Yeah!”

Aaron turns and nods and as one, the women vacate the couch, Penny taking David with her and leaving Nigma defenseless. His eyes go wide when he realizes just what his daughter has in store for him. “Ellen Diane Dixon, don’t you dare-”

“GET HIM!” she shrieks. Nigma doesn’t have the time to get off the couch before they’re on him, Aaron holding him in place and Ellen pushing the sweater over his head. Nigma lets out loud protests but doesn’t offer much physical resistance. Finally, the pair back away and Nigma is left sitting on the couch, wearing the most hideous Christmas sweater Aaron has ever seen. He glares up at them, but it’s more for show than anything serious. Time, reformation and parenthood seem to have finally tamed the former Rogue. “There,” Ellen says. “Is that so horrible?”

Nigma turns to Aaron. “Cash, would you like to adopt her?”


	4. Movie Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jon's taste in Christmas movies leaves something to be desired.

Edward should have known Jonathan was up to something when his lover flipped the script by coming to bother Edward in his workspace. Jonathan came up behind where Edward was typing away at his computer, leaned down and kissed the top of his head. “Hey, darlin’.”

Edward paused in his typing, first in surprise, then in pleasure. “Well, this is a nice change. What’s the occasion-” he then paused and turned his chair around to look up at Jonathan and his far too pleased face. “Jonathan Crane, what did you do this time?”

Jonathan merely stood and smiled. An almost beatific smile that did nothing to ease Edward’s suspicions. “I can’t just come to see you?”

Edward narrowed his eyes. “Don’t try that game with me, Jonathan. We both know I’m too clever for that.”

Jonathan chuckled. “Of course. I was just coming to ask if you wanted to come out and watch a Christmas movie with me.”

Edward raised an eyebrow. “A Christmas movie? Why on Earth do you of all people want to watch a Christmas movie? Oh wait, let me guess. It’s another movie about a killer Santa or Snowman, isn’t it?”

Jonathan patiently shook his head. “No, darlin’. It’s a traditional Christmas movie. I promise.”

Edward considered the matter, then got out of his chair. “Alright. But so help me, Jonathan, if this is another one of your schlocky horror pictures, it’s the couch for you until New Year’s!”

* * *

 

“A traditional Christmas movie,” Edward drawled as another character on screen met a gruesome fate at the hands of some kind of goat demon. “I should have known.”

“The Krampus is a traditional Christmas figure in Germanic parts of the world,” Jonathan defended. “So I didn’t lie to you. At any rate, you said you wanted to spend more time together.”

Edward huffed then settled back onto the sofa. “At least this has better production values than the garbage you normally subject me to. I suppose the Krampus also traditionally uses a chainsaw to dispatch his victims?”

“No, but he does carry naughty children off to Hell.”

“Charming. You’re still sleeping on the couch for the rest of the year.”

“You’ll miss me.”

“I will not-” Edward flinched as the Krampus proceeded to whip the skin off a man. “Jesus Christ, can’t you pick anything less violent?”

A laugh was the only response Edward received. 


	5. Jon's Christmas Tradition (Tales from Gotham Academy verse)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Penelope discovers a tradition of Jonathan's.

Penelope was just putting the finishing touches on her report when the door to her office opened. “Penny…”

She looked up to see Harley in her doorway holding her sides, tears streaming down her face. Her concern was replaced by curiosity when she realized that they were tears of laughter. “What is it?”

“It’s Jonny,” Harley managed to gasp through her laughter. “Ya gotta see this, he’s in the teacher’s lounge.” She walked out the door and waved her hand. “Come on! It’s a scream!”

Penelope sighed, then saved her progress before getting up to follow Harley towards the teacher’s lounge. What on Earth was Jonathan up to now?

There was a crowd in the teacher’s lounge which made it a bit difficult for her to push her way through. Finally, through the crowd, Penelope caught a glimpse of a figure sitting at a table. She made her way to the front of the crowd and her jaw dropped. The figure was dressed in a black furry costume and a demonic mask with a fake tongue lolling out and goat horns protruding from the top. It wore a basket on its back and was holding what looked to her like tree branches. Tetch sat next to the figure, concern, and fear etched on his face while Edward stood to the side, shaking his head. Penelope approached her boyfriend. “Is that…Jonathan?”

Edward let out a short laugh. “Unfortunately!”

“What is he…doing?”

“Oh, this? This is Jon’s version of ringing in the season.”

“He’s done this before?”

“Every year since I’ve known him. He usually has the decency to leave the costume at home though. This is the first time I’ve seen him wear it at school.” He addressed Jonathan. “I hope you’re happy Jon! You’re making Penny upset!”

“No he’s not,” she argued. She walked up to the table and took a seat across from Jonathan. “What’s all this about?”

Jonathan finally removed the mask. “I am the Krampus,” he said.

“I see that. Why?”

He shrugged. “You have your ways of celebrating Christmas. I have mine.”

“And this has nothing to do with the fact that this is the first day Bolton’s back after being on leave?”

Jonathan cackled. “Excuse me, child. It’s time for the Krampus to make his rounds.” He put the mask back on and got up from the table and made his way to the door. She followed him as far as the hall, where students had begun to gather and take pictures. “Hello, naughty children,” he spoke, his voice muffled through the mask. “Tis the season for fear!”

Penelope pinched the bridge of her nose. That job at the criminal asylum was starting to look pretty good right about now.


	6. Aaron Cash Deserves a Raise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron deserves at least one raise for working the Holidays at Arkham.

Aaron hated having to work in Arkham during the Holiday season. He’d never begrudge the patients the right to celebrate, but every year, without fail, one of the Rogues would do something to fuck everything up. 

Aaron watched Nigma with a narrow gaze as the Rogue draped lights around the large Christmas Tree Dr. Arkham had erected in the center of the Rec Room. “That’s enough, Nigma,” he said. “You’ve got enough lights on that thing people will be able to see it from space.”

Nigma tutted as he stepped off of the stool. “Where’s your Christmas Spirit Cash? Some of us like decorations!”

“Desecrating a dead body, more like it,” Isley hissed from the sofa. Frankly, Aaron thought it was a mistake getting a real tree, but Dr. Arkham was insistent. 

“Settle down,” Aaron warned. As soon as Nigma took a step back to admire his work, Aaron flipped the switch. Just like he thought, the number of lights Nigma had draped around the tree was almost blinding. “Damn,” he swore, squinting his eyes shut. “We’re gonna need sunglasses just to be in this room!”

“I know,” Nigma said. “Isn’t it great? I think this may be my masterpiece!”

The assorted grumblings from the other guards and inmates seemed to disagree with Nigma. Only Harley was at all impressed with the display. From where he was sitting with Tetch playing chess, Crane suddenly spoke up. “Anyone else smell smoke?”

Aaron opened his eyes and saw smoke rising from the tree. “Shit! I knew that was too many lights!” The sheer amount of lights overwhelmed the electric wires, causing them to short circuit. Aaron flipped off the light switch, but it was too late. The tree became engulfed in flames.

“Oh no!” Harley wailed. “The tree!” Joker began to laugh hysterically as the flames began to lick the ceiling of the rec room.

“Everybody out!” Aaron yelled. “Evacuate to the yard! Go, go, go!” The guards quickly herded the patients out to the snowy yard as smoke began to billow from the rec room. The group watched as the GCFD arrived, too late to save the rec room, but just in time to prevent the entire asylum from going up in flames.

When it was over, Aaron turned to Nigma and glared at him. “Well Nigma, you did it again. You ruined Christmas.”

“I did no such thing!” He argued. “The poor conditions of the asylum did that! You ought to be thanking me for bringing this to light-” he was cut off by the rest of the patients hurling snowballs at him. Aaron watched this with a frustrated sigh. He really, really hated working the Holiday season.


	7. A Visitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edward receives an unusual visitor.

Edward was about eight years old when he saw it.

He’d been lying awake at night in his bed on Christmas Eve, nursing a black eye he’d received from his father when he heard the rattling of chains outside his room. He lay as still as possible, trying not to let out a whimper in case it was his father. The door opened and Edward’s eyes went wide when he saw a figure enter his room.

It was tall, walking towards him on cloven hooves, the face hideous, the tongue lolling out, the fangs glistening in the moonlight. It stopped at the foot of his bed. “Edward,” it said and the voice was guttural. 

Edward peeked his head over the thin blanket he slept under, not able to speak. The figure spoke again, louder. “Edward Nashton!”

“Y-yes?” Edward said. He was shaking now, trying not to cry. His father would get even angrier when he cried.

“Do you know who I am?” The figure asked.

“N-no…”

“I am the Krampus,” it said. It stretched a hand towards Edward, and the boy shuddered when he saw the long claws. “I come to take evil children away.”

Edward closed his eyes and let out a choked sob. It was just like his father said, he was a cheater, he was stupid, it was his fault Mom had left, he ruined everyone’s lives just by existing, he didn’t deserve to live-

“But you are not evil, child.”

Edward’s eyes flew open. The Krampus stood still, looking at him with coal black eyes. “I know what your father said,” it spoke again. “And he was wrong.”

Edward blinked. If his father was wrong, then why was the Krampus here? “I am here to warn you,” it said. “You are not evil, but I see a darkness in you child. Do not let your desire to prove your father wrong destroy you.” The Krampus walked back towards the door, stopping only to give him one last look. “I will be watching you, Edward Nashton.” The Krampus disappeared from sight.

For years, Edward thought it had been a dream, until one night.

One Christmas Eve, he was up late, reviewing the plans for his heist of the Museum of Fine Art, and he heard the rattle of chains. He turned around slowly and saw it again. He was a grown man now though and after all he had seen, a Krampus was a minor thing. “Ah,” he said. “Have you finally come to take me away?”

“No,” it said. “You are a man grown. You are beyond my reach.”

“Then why are you here?”

The Krampus tilted its head. “I am here to tell you how disappointed I am.”

Somehow, that was even worse.

 


	8. First Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edward and Ellen’s first Christmas Eve.

“Daddy, I want another story!”

Edward looked down to check his watch. “Ellen, it’s 8:30. Past time for little girls to be in bed.”

Ellen pouted as only a stubborn five-year-old could. “But Daddy, it’s Christmas!”

“It’s Christmas Eve sweetpea,” Edward insists. Ellen though didn’t look like she’d budge. Edward sighed. He really needed to learn how to say no to this child or she’d walk all over him. It was Christmas Eve though. Their first Christmas Eve together. He pet the spot next to him on the couch. “Alright. One more.”

Ellen scrambled onto the couch, sitting up close to her father as he cracks open the children’s book. In front of them, there was a fire going in the fireplace. The house they wound up in after he took her from the foster home she was in and fled Gotham was smaller than he’d like, but it had a fireplace.

He’d gotten through maybe five pages of The Nutcracker when he heard light breathing. Ellen had fallen asleep beside him. Edward smiled and, as gently as he could, lifted Ellen off the couch and carried her off to her bedroom. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever fully get a hang on this fatherhood puzzle, but tonight was a good night.


	9. Spooky, It's Cold Outside (Scriddler)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jonathan hates the cold, but Edward makes it better.

_“…Weather forecasters are predicting a low of 20 degrees tonight with up to ten inches of snow, so stay bundled up Gotham!”_

Jonathan was buried under a comforter and three blankets and he still felt the cold from outside in his old bones. He wrapped the comforter around him as tight as he could given his awkward form, but he still shivered. He let out a curse. Why had he decided on Gotham and not chosen Florida to torment? 

“Jon! Come out here!”

Jonathan poked his head out from under the covers. “What do you want, Edward?”

“I want to show you something!”

“And you can’t bring it in the bedroom why?”

“Just come out!”

Jonathan had half a mind to ignore his lover, but he knew that in about five minutes, give or take, Edward would come in and drag him off the bed. So he got up, taking the comforter with him, draped around his shoulders. “This had better be good, Edward,” he warned. 

He walked into the living room to find Edward waiting for him on the couch with a warm drink and a fire going in the fireplace. “Is this good enough, Dearest?” he asked. He pets the spot on the couch next to him. “Come here.”

Jonathan does gladly, settling next to Edward and taking the mug from him. He already feels about ten degrees warmer. Edward pressed himself against his thin body and Jonathan felt a few degrees warmer still. Jonathan pressed a grateful kiss to Edward’s cheek after he took a sip of the mulled cider. “Thank you, Darlin’.”

Edward smiled. “You’re welcome.” The pair spent the rest of the day cuddled in front of the fire, watching the snow fall outside and reveling in each other’s warmth.


	10. A Christmas 'Miracle'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which even Edward is capable of some decency.

It was well after 2 am by the time Esme made it back to the Narrows from her shift at Arkham. She was looking forward to sleep. She entered her building, took the elevators up the six flights of stairs to her apartment, walked down the long hallway, reached into her purse to pull out her keys, then froze in her tracks. Her apartment door was wide open. She ran into the apartment and realized that her television was gone. More devastating though, was the knocked over small Christmas tree she had set up, the broken ornaments, and the missing presents. Esme collapsed to her knees with a sob.

* * *

“It’s all gone,” she said in the Arkham infirmary the next day, still crying. “All the presents I got for the kids this year, everything!”

Dr. Cassidy gave her a hug. “I’m so sorry, Esme,” she said. “What did the police say?”

Esme dabbed her eyes with the tissue Dr. Cassidy had given her. “They’ll be looking, but Christmas is only three days away. What am I going to do, I can’t replace everything!” She began to sob again. Christmas was her favorite time of the year. It wasn’t fair. Dr. Cassidy rubbed her shoulders, trying in vain to comfort her. Neither of them paid much attention to the patient who had been brought in for his monthly physical. But Edward Nigma had listened to every word.

As soon as he was brought back to his cell, he pulled out the cell phone he had hidden in his cot for emergencies. “Nina, Deirdre,” he said after he’d made a call. “I need you to do something for me…”

* * *

The night before Christmas Eve, Esme made the long trek back to her apartment, her heart heavy with every step. She’d told her mother what had happened, that Christmas with her was canceled this year and she felt sick. When she got to her apartment this time though, there was a note pinned on her door. A note with a green question mark on it. 

Esme’s heart pounded in her chest. Nigma. Was he targeting her now? Why? She’d never been anything but nice to the man! She took a breath and grabbed the note.

It read,  _“Merry Christmas. E. Nigma.”_ Esme was left even more confused. Was he sending the staff Christmas notes now? She shook her head and opened the door.

When she stepped inside, her jaw dropped.

Her Christmas Tree was standing upright again and covered in brand new ornaments, more beautiful and expensive than those she’d had before. At the base of the tree were over a dozen wrapped presents, replacing the ones that were lost. There was even a new television in place of the one that had been stolen!

Esme covered her mouth with one hand and let out another, happy sob. After doing all this for her, did it really matter why?


	11. Under the Mistletoe (RiddleCat)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Selina has a bit of fun at Oswald's party.

When asked later, Selina would say it was the champagne.

She’d had quite a bit of it at Oswald’s Holiday party, but then again, so had everyone. Even Pam was looking a bit flushed, laughing at some corny joke Harley whispered in her ear. Everyone was gathered around under the chandelier in the center of the Iceberg Lounge, laughing, drinking, having a good time for once in their lives.

Well, almost everybody.

Selina looked to the periphery of the room and saw Edward standing alone, watching the others with disinterest and sipping out of a flute of champagne. Selina looked up a bit and noticed that he was standing under a sprig of mistletoe that Oswald’s waitstaff had hung up. She smirked, then got up from the table and sauntered up to Edward. “Hey Eddie,” she purred.

Edward arched an eyebrow. “Selina.”

“Having fun?”

Edward huffed. “Not especially. I’m not much for parties. I only came because Oswald insisted. I was just about ready to leave as a matter of fact.”

“Oh?” Selina asked. “Aren’t you waiting for a kiss?”

“I beg your pardon?”

So he hadn’t noticed. Selina pointed up towards the ceiling and Edward’s eyes widened when he noticed the mistletoe. “I-oh.”

Selina grinned. ‘Well, Eddie? You going to keep a girl waiting?”

Edward flushed a bright pink, then gave Selina a peck on the cheek. “There. Happy?”

Selina laughed, then grabbed ahold of Edward’s tie. “Oh, come on Eddie. You can do better than that.” She pulled him down into a long kiss on the lips. Edward made an indignant squeak, then grabbed ahold of her shoulders, deepening the kiss. Selina vaguely heard catcalls coming from the group behind them and let go, leaving Edward dazed in her wake. She had to smirk. The man actually was kind of adorable, when he wasn’t being…well, him. She gave him another small peck on the cheek. “Merry Christmas, Eddie.”


	12. Winter Wonderland

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edward enjoys a bit of time to himself.

Edward is not a man who likes extreme temperatures in either direction. He hates searing heat and sticky humidity as much as he hates bitter cold and sharp ice.

On some days though, when he’s sufficiently bundled and the wind is still, he can bring himself to enjoy the first snowfall.

This year he happens to be alone, sitting on a bench overlooking the Park when the snow begins to fall. Slowly, but surely, it begins to collect at the ground around him, covering the dead brown grass with a white blanket.

It’s quiet as the snow falls. It’s beautiful. For once, something in this godforsaken town is beautiful.

Others will come out eventually and he’ll have to move on, lest he is recognized, but for a moment, Edward enjoys the winter wonderland that seems to have been made just for him, and maybe it was.


	13. Santa Crow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jonathan in a Santa Claus costume vs. a group of small children. Who will win?

 

Even by Jonathan’s standards, this latest scheme was diabolical.

It was two days before Christmas Eve and Gotham Oaks Shopping Plaza was packed to the gills with last minute shoppers. Useless fools. Lambs to slaughter.

Jonathan was hidden away in a corner by the toy store on the first level, dressed in a Santa suit he’d ‘borrowed’ from a mall Santa outside. As soon as the path was clear, he’d make his way to the food court on the second level, then release his toxin via the AC system. In a matter of minutes, this mall would be filled with hundreds, thousands cowering in witless terror-

“Santa?”

Jonathan turned sharply, his hand on a vial of toxin hidden in the too large sleeve of the costume. He felt someone tugging at his leg and looked down. There were a group of children, looking up at him with wide eyes. “Santa?” the little girl in front asked again. “Is that you?”

Jonathan was glad that the fake beard hid his facial expression.”Uh, yes, yes child, it’s me.”

A second child walked up, tilting his head. “Why are you so skinny? Are you on a diet?”

This really wasn’t what Jonathan needed right now. “Yes, I am. Now if you’ll excuse me, children-”

“Santa!” Another child ran up. “Can I have a bike for Christmas?”

Jonathan growled a bit in frustration. “If you’re good. Now children, I really need to-”

“I wanna a pony!”

“I want a new video game!”

Jonathan could and should use the vial he had on these little pests, but…that would draw unwanted attention. He’d never really been interested in children’s fears anyway. So he did the next most logical thing. He ran. 

“Now there’s something you don’t see everyday Edgar,” a security guard drawled to his co-worker on the main floor.

“What’s that, Chauncey?”

The first guard pointed and the two men were treated to the sight of an emaciated-looking Santa running at top speed from a mob of yelling children. “That,” he said.


	14. Present (Jonathan and Harley)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley gets Jonathan a present whether he wants one or not.

“Jonny! What do ya want for Christmas?”

“Some peace and quiet for a change,” Jonathan answered, not looking up from his book. “Why are you even asking, Harley? It’s barely October.”

“It’s never to early to start shoppin’ Jonny!” Harley responded, plopping herself on the Arkham rec room couch next to Jonathan, ignoring his glare at being disturbed. “Come on! What do ya want?”

“To be left alone,” Jonathan said.

He tried to ignore Harley’s pout and go back to his reading.

* * *

 

Two months later, Jonathan was in the middle of yet another test of his chemicals when he heard a knocking at the front door of his hideout. He groaned, then put the beakers down. He only knew one person brave enough to seek him out and polite enough to knock.

Sure enough, when he opened the door, Harley stood on the other side, holding a package and smiling brightly. “Merry Christmas, Jonny!”

Jonathan stepped to the side and allowed her to enter. He was never good at saying no to her. As soon as she was inside, she shivered. “Jeez, Jonny! Don’tcha ever turn up the heat?”

“Don’t have heat to turn on,” he answered. “What do you want, Harley?”

“To give you this!” Harley shoved the package into Jonathan’s hands. He stared at it for a long moment. “Oh come on!” Harley wheedled. “Open it!”

Jonathan sighed, then did as he was told. He opened the package to find a large, orange sweater with a Jack-o-Lantern’s grin stitched on the front. “I made it myself!” Harley said. “Do ya like it, Jonny?”

The sweater was absolutely hideous. Jonathan stared at it for a long moment, then pulled it over his head. It was ungainly, but it was warm. “I love it.”


	15. Joan Leland Needs a Vacation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Self-Explanatory.

“I still say this is a bad idea, Doc.”

“Aaron,” Dr. Leland chided, “Having a creative outlet is good for the patients.”

Cash huffed. “If you say so. I’m just glad we didn’t give them real scissors.”

“Stop hogging all the green paper, Harvey!”

“Shut up, Nigma!”

Dr. Leland stepped forward to break up at the fight at the Arts and Crafts table. “Harvey, Edward. Please share the paper.”

Harvey glared at Edward before he ripped off a small scrap of green paper.   
“There. Knock yourself out. You better not hang a question mark shaped candy cane on our cell door again.”

“Oh, don’t worry. I will.”

“Edward-” Dr. Leland scolded when another loud voice filled the rec room. She turned to see Wesker, or more appropriately, Wesker’s doll, yelling at Waylon over a crudely cut out snowflake.

“What kinda sad snowflake is that?” Mr. Scarface yelled. “That don’t even look like a snowflake!”

“Shut up!” Waylon shouted, waving the safety scissors at the doll. “I’ll jab these in your eyes!”

“You try that and I’ll turn youse into a new pair of boots!”

“Why you little-”

“Enough, both of you!” Dr. Leland shouted. “One more outburst and I’ll have you both sent back to your cells!”

A loud shriek sounded in the dead center of the room. All eyes and ears went to Harley, pointing at the top of the Christmas tree in horror. ‘Who put a dead rat on top of the tree!?”

Dr. Leland looked up and cringed when she saw a rat, impaled on the top branch of the tree.  Edward and Wesker audibly gagged, while Waylon, Harvey, Scarface, and Cash looked to the most likely suspect, given that Joker was still in Solitary. Jonathan Crane looked back at all of them smugly. “Yes?”

“Jonathan,” Dr. Leland sighed. “Why?”

Jonathan shrugged. “We needed a topper.”

“And you thought a dead rat was appropriate?”

“It’s got a Santa hat on.”

“That does it, Spooky,” Cash said. “You’re going back to your cell.”

“For what? Decorating like the rest of you?”

“Take him back and throw away the key, Cash!”

“You stay out of this, Nigma!”

“You’re gettin’ nothin’ but coal this year, Jonny!”

Dr. Leland sighed as the entire room became engulfed in a vicious argument. Next year, she was going to Bermuda for Christmas.


	16. Gathering Around the Tree (RiddleCat)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Selina gets Edward to celebrate Christmas with her, kicking and screaming.

“Selina,” Edward asked carefully. “What is this in my living room?”

Selina rolled her eyes. “It’s a Christmas tree, genius.”

“I see that!” he snapped. “Why is there a Christmas tree in my living room!?”

“I put it there.”

Edward began to massage his temple. “Dearest,” he said finally. “Darling. Love of my life. Why did you put a Christmas tree in my apartment?”

Selina sauntered up to him, a smile on those red lips. “Because it’s Christmas, Eddie. Don’t you like to celebrate Christmas?”

Edward scoffed. “Didn’t the lack of any decor hint at the fact that I don’t?”

“Well, we can’t have that, now can we? As long as we have our little ‘arrangement’, we’re celebrating Christmas. Now come on and help me decorate the tree.”

Edward didn’t move at first, stubbornly staying put in the spot by the couch before Selina grabbed a firm grip on his hand and pulled him towards the tree. He followed her, glaring at the tree the whole while. As soon as Selina let go of his hand and leaned down to begin unpacking the box of ornaments she brought, he folded his arms and continued to glare at the tree. He hadn’t liked Christmas since he was eight years old since his mother-he shook his head. He was past that now.

“Eddie?”

Edward looked to see Selina holding a green and gold ornament in her hand. “You want to do the honors?”

Edward huffed and took the ornament, hanging it on a low lying branch. “There.”

Selina arched a manicured eyebrow. “Really?” she drawled. “I would have thought you could decorate better than that.”

Edward’s ears pricked up. “Was that a challenge?”

Selina smirked. “Maybe.”

Edward knew he was being manipulated. He also knew though that he could never turn down a challenge. “Step back, darling.”


	17. Festival of Lights (HarleyIvy)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley celebrates over the years.

Harley always liked the lights the best at the holidays.

Not just the Christmas lights, though of course, she liked those too. Growing up in an interfaith household, she got to enjoy Hanukkah as much as Christmas. Lighting the menorah, with her parents and her brother, when her father wasn’t in jail at least, was a highlight of the season.

Not just when she was a child, either. In college and when she’d begun her career, she had always made time to come home to light the menorah.

Until one year, she didn’t.

He’d never allowed her to get a tree, much less a menorah. So for years, Harley had gone without and each year she did, she felt a little more of her die each time, until one year, she left.

For their first Holiday season together, Harley had asked Red if they could get a tree and a menorah. She agreed to an aluminum tree only and had bought a menorah for Harley herself.

That first night, Harley lit the candles of the menorah for the first time in years and cried tears of happiness.


	18. Some People Never Learn (PI Verse)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Selina has a run-in with a familiar face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember the Krampus from 'Christmas in Gotham'? Well, he's back...

Selina hated shopping the days leading up to Christmas, but she certainly didn’t mind dining out. She’d prefer some company, but Bruce was on his usual evening rounds, Eddie was out with his daughter and his new desired paramour, and Harley and Ivy were…not around. 

So she sat at an outdoor table of one of the cafes that were nestled in Jezebel Plaza, sipping her glass of red wine and watching the shoppers go by when she heard the telltale sound of gunfire. The shoppers passing by dropped their bags and ran, screaming for the stairs and exits. Selina finished her wine and got up, making sure to grab her own bag before running to a ladies room to change.

By the time she made it back out to the plaza, she could see the figure causing so much chaos walking towards her, firing his gun wildly in the sky. She could make out a dark fursuit, a fanged mask and…goat horns? Wait, was that a Krampus? Didn’t Eddie mention something about him and Ellie running into a guy dressed as a Krampus last year? Selina shook her head and unfurled her whip. Some people just didn’t learn, did they? 

“I am the Krampus!” she heard the man shout. “Say your prayers and kneel before the demon of Christmas!”

“The demon of Christmas?” Selina asked. “Seriously?”

The Krampus looked at her and paused. “Man, are you serious? First Riddler, now Catwoman? Can’t I go one year without running into you freaks?”

“Look who’s talking,” Selina drawled. With a flick of her wrist, she cracked her whip and pulled the gun out of the hands of the Krampus, sending it to the ground before her. She stepped on the barrel with her boot, then took another step forward. “Now, I was having a nice night before you showed up. What do you suppose we’re going to do about that?”

The Krampus visibly sagged. “Aw, crap.”


	19. Peace and Quiet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jonathan can be decent once in a while.

“So Cash, what do you want for Christmas this year?”

Aaron scoffed at Crane’s question. “Same thing I want every year, Spooky. Just one night of peace and quiet.”

On the other side of the cell door, Aaron could hear Crane cluck his tongue. “That’s how many years you’ve asked for that? Four, five? Perhaps you should ask for something else.”

“Perhaps you should go to sleep,” Aaron scolded. “It’s 2 am.”

“I was aware.”

Aaron shook his head. “I’ve got half an hour left on my shift. I don’t need to waste it talkin’ to you. Nighty night Spooky.”

“Until tomorrow.”

* * *

Aaron was suspicious. He was exactly eight hours into his ten-hour shift, and absolutely nothing had happened. That was what made him suspicious. The inmates never gave him this kind of break, not unless they were planning something. A breakout? A riot? Or were they just fucking with him? Time to find out and the best way to do that was to question one of the most likely suspects.

“Hey, Spooky! You awake.”

“Always.”

“What’s goin’ on?”

“Is that paranoia I hear, Cash? Are you quite alright?”

“Don’t even start with that Spooky. You’ve all been quiet today. I want to know why. What’s goin’ on?”

There was a pause before Crane spoke again. “You told me last night that all you wanted was a night of peace and quiet, did you not?”

Aaron was glad that Crane couldn’t see his shocked expression. “Behaving yourselves for one day doesn’t exactly count as a Christmas present.”

“It’ll have to do. Was that all?”

Aaron shook his head. “Yeah, that’s all.” Before he walked down the hall to continue his rounds, he spoke under his breath. “Thanks, Crane.”


	20. Petty Presents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most of the time, he's a dick though.

“Did you get the delivery set up?”

“Yes, Jonathan,” Edward said with an irritated sigh. He poked at the grey slop that passed for oatmeal in the Arkham cafeteria with his plastic spoon and scowled. “And to think my tax dollars go towards serving us this slop.”

“You’re sure Kellerman will receive it today? And since when do you pay taxes?”

“It’s the principle of the matter, Jonathan! And for the last time, yes. The esteemed Dr. Kellerman received his sweet peach tea approximately 15 minutes ago. May I ask why exactly you ordered him tea? You hate the man if I recall.”

“I do,” Jonathan agreed. “He’s a hack who has no business in the profession.”

“And yet, you spent money you don’t have buying him a Christmas present? What are you really up to? You couldn’t possibly have been able to tamper with it.”

“No,” Jonathan admitted with a cruel gleam in his eye. “But I happen to know that he has a traumatic memory related to peach tea. To clarify, the last time I gave him what he so richly deserves, it was administered through his tea. He hasn’t been able to drink it since.”

A long, loud, keening cry sounded from the staff lounge just adjacent to the cafeteria where the inmates ate. Everyone recognized it as Dr. Kellerman’s voice.

Edward gave his vitriolic friend a long look. “You truly are the pettiest son of a bitch I've ever met, Jonathan Crane.”

Jonathan just cackled.


	21. Merry Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But sometimes, even Jonathan can be good.

Every year at Christmas, Arkham held a Holiday party for the medical staff, security guards and orderlies. It was held in the employee lounge, located on the far Northern part of the Asylum, far away from the patients. For a few hours each year, the staff could relax, socialize, and pretend that they weren’t only meters away from homicidal criminals.

Until tonight.

Unknown to the staff, Jonathan had escaped from his cell an hour earlier. He didn’t have his costume on him, but he did have a satchel on him that contained a rudimentary form of his toxin, put together from the chemicals he had stashed in hiding places scattered about the grounds. He was on the other side of the door to the lounge, the door cracked open just an inch to allow him to peer inside. The fools felt so secure they didn’t bother to have guards keeping a watch out. A pity for them, but a boon to Jonathan. He opened the door just an inch wider and no one was any the wiser. He smiled, then reached into his pocket for his toxin. It would be so easy, just one use, and all of Arkham’s staff would be at his mercy-

A figure caught his attention and he froze. A young woman with dark hair, skin, and eyes and just passed into his line of sight and he recognized her instantly. It was a nurse from the infirmary, the nurse who had given him water when no one else would. She was wearing a tacky green sweater over her work uniform and her face was flushed with happiness. What was her name? Esme? Yes, Esme. Another nurse was saying something to her and Esme laughed out loud. She looked happier than Jonathan could ever recall seeing her. He still held the toxin in his hand. He looked down at it, then at Esme, then at the toxin again.

Finally, he sighed, let his grip on the satchel loosen, then shut the door. “Merry Christmas, child,” he murmured. He then walked away from the lounge and down the hall back towards his cell block.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas everyone! Thank you for all the encouragement and support you've given me this year and last. Have a happy holiday and I'll see you in 2019!


End file.
